Bill Kirby: Each night my dreams come and go ... quickly

Oct. 14—"The best way to make your dreams come true is to wake up." — Paul Valery

I'm not very good at dreaming.

I rarely remember what my mind was seeing while I was asleep. Maybe I'm missing something. But I wouldn't know.

I tried to keep a log in a nightstand notebook, as someone suggested.

Of course, that someone complained when I turned the light on to write what I had just dreamed, so I had to write notes in the dark.

My handwriting was undecipherable the next morning, so I quit.

I was reading a scientific article about how "job-related dreams" had changed as more people worked from home than in a workplace. That would make sense.

The common dream of a work project due, but un-done, has often been replaced with dreams of technological meltdowns during Zoom meetings.

Maybe I have that dream, too, but I've forgotten.

(I'll check my notebook.)

SPEAKING OF LOGS: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention once surveyed 150,000 of us asking how many days each month we feel sad, blue or depressed.

The average was 3 — 3.5 days for women and 2.4 for men.

They also found out young people tend to have more "sad" days than old people.

I can hardly wait.

GRANDPARENTS NICKNAMES III: Edie Zareck, of North Augusta, continues your thoughts on determining a grandparent's "nickname" with this: "Our first great-grand-baby will be calling his grandparents ... Pepa & Popa, on dad's side and Lolly & Pop, on mom's side."

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: "Whether a man ends up with a nest egg or a goose egg, depends on the chick he marries."

TODAY'S JOKE: A young woman was working on a school writing project from home, and asked her father for help.

"Dad," she asked, "what is the difference between 'anger' and 'exasperation'?"

The father was quiet for a moment, then said, "Here, let me show you."

He picked up his telephone and called a number at random. A man answered and he asked, "Is Melvin there?"

"There's no one here named Melvin," the man said and hung up.

The father hung up and said, "See, this man was probably pretty busy with something else and didn't appreciate the interruption. Now, watch this."

The father re-dialed the number and again asked for Melvin.

"Look," the voice said at the other end, "You just called and I told you, there's no one named Melvin here!"

Again, he hung up abruptly.

"That," said the father turning to his daughter, "was anger. Now, I'll show you exasperation."

He dialed the number a third time, and an angry voice shouted, "Hello!"

"Hello," the father said calmly. "This is Melvin. Have there been any calls for me?"

Bill Kirby has reported, photographed and commented on life in Augusta and Georgia for 45 years.

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